Spiritual Growth Through Silence and Solitude

In the busy world in which we live, silence and solitude are rare commodities. Think about the last time you experienced total silence. No cars driving by. No white noise coming from the TV. Just you and your thoughts. It might be hard to remember the last time you experienced this. Or when was the last time you were completely alone, when you were disconnected from your phone and social media, when there were no people around you? Do you remember a time when it was just you? The fast urban life many people live today does not foster opportunities to experience silence and solitude. That is unfortunate because these two disciplines are key to spiritual growth.

Jesus himself consistently modeled the practices of silence and solitude as he slipped away early in the morning to be with his Father. Without silence and solitude in your life, Spiritual growth will be difficult to achieve. If Jesus needed it, then likely you will need it too.

Fighting Against the Current of Culture

Creating opportunities for silence and solitude in your life will require you to fight against the current of American society. While some sub-cultures in America value these disciplines, culture at large values loud, communal gatherings. These aren’t wrong, but you won’t find many people taking time to be by themselves in the quiet.

If you don’t believe this, then just look at American events. Some of the most popular events consist of movies, concerts, and sporting events where hundreds and thousands of people congregate and listen to deafening noise.

Beyond the value of communal gatherings, deeper currents of culture fight against silence and solitude. Silence is fought by smartphones and the ability to listen to music, watch videos, or talk with anyone, anytime and anywhere.

Again, it’s not that these things are inherently wrong, but they don’t facilitate space for silence. It’s common to see people walking alone or even hiking with earbuds in. Walking and being in nature used to be places where silence reigned, but in the modern world, very few spaces are left where silence reigns.

Solitude is also becoming increasingly rare. The nature of cities and transportation means most of your time is spent surrounded by other people or cars filled with people. And even if you are a freelancer who works from home, you will always be connected to your work partners and friends through social media, making some form of connection only a click away.

It’s even unlikely to go hiking deep into the woods without running into groups of explorers. The world continues to be filled with more people and more noise, making silence and solitude more and more scarce.

Why Does Society Avoid Silence and Solitude?

There is another reason silence and solitude are becoming increasingly rare. It’s not just because there are more people in the world. It’s also because culture doesn’t like silence and solitude.

Silence is Frightening

Experiencing true silence is like swimming in a deep, mysterious lake. As you swim into the center, you begin to feel fear. The fear of the unknown. Peering into the dark depths only reveals shifting shapes and shadows created by the sun and sky. You can’t see what lies beneath and are unsure of what will rise to the surface.

While the above analogy may seem extreme, there is truth to it. In silence, your heart and mind will go places you may have been avoiding for a long time. Sitting in silence allows you to feel the things you’ve been trying to avoid. It brings the deep things of your life to the surface.

It’s no surprise that many people avoid silence. The noise of the TV, music, and conversation help to keep the deeper thoughts and emotions at bay. Noise is like a jet ski that keeps you skipping across the water just fast enough to never think about what is going on underneath.

But as a Christian seeking to grow in your faith, you will have to face the silence to grow. Jesus consistently faced the silence with God. And so should you. The silence is where God can speak. He can guide you, comfort you, and call you to account in the gentleness of silence. Many people struggle to hear God, but it’s often the result of too little silence. Sometimes the volume of your life is too loud to hear him.

So, if you want to experience spiritual growth in your relationship with Christ, you will need to find places where you can be in silence with God. Wade into the deep waters where he wants to meet you and minister to the wounds in your soul.

A Counselor as a Guide

As you begin entering the silence, you may find a Christian counselor to be a helpful guide. In the silence, you will likely encounter forgotten wounds and hidden pains. These can be difficult to sort out, so as you enter the silence, meeting with a spiritual guide can be helpful for spiritual growth.

Throughout church history, there have always been pastors, mystics, priests, and other religious leaders who served as spiritual guides. A Christian counselor can be that guide for you. They will be able to help you process your experiences and lead you into a deeper relationship with God.

Solitude is Viewed as Weakness

Another reason people avoid solitude is that being alone is viewed as a weakness. People will do anything in life to not be alone. Partially because being alone leads to silence, and as already discussed, people are usually trying to avoid silence.

But there are other reasons people avoid being alone. People who are alone in society are often outcasts or miscreants. If nothing else, it usually shows that they are at least different, which is unfortunately why people avoid them. Because of this, intentionally being alone is often viewed by others negatively.

Instead, the goal is to be as popular and social as possible. The terms used in society to describe socially active and inactive people make this clear. Socially active people are referred to as, “social butterflies” while socially inactive people are “lone wolves.” These are quite different images and reveal a bias toward social activity.

Practicing Silence and Solitude for Spiritual Growth

The truth is American society does not prioritize silence and solitude. So, if you want to grow as a Christian, you will need to incorporate these practices into your life on your own. Here are some simple ideas of ways you can add these foundational spiritual rhythms into your life.

10 Minutes of Silence and Solitude

Each morning before you leave for work and start checking your phone, take ten minutes to sit in silence. Set a timer so you don’t have to worry about looking at the clock. You can just focus on your breathing or repeat a simple prayer in your head, but don’t talk and don’t just pray normally in your head. Take the time to intentionally be in the silence and listen.

Don’t Listen to Music in the Car

Most people need to drive every day. And most people immediately turn on the radio or music in their car. Try not to do that and drive in silence. Intentionally use this time to listen and reflect on your day.

Do Something by Yourself

This one sounds simple, but it might be harder than you think. Pick something you like to do, but that you usually do with friends. Maybe it’s going on a hike, or going to the movies, or going to the beach. Whatever it is, do it by yourself.

Don’t invite your friends. Just go for it and see what it is like. Intentionally don’t bring music, or check social media, or use any other outlet to connect with people. Just be by yourself doing something you love. As you head home, reflect with God on what it was like and what it brought up in your heart.

Conclusion

Silence and solitude are key disciplines for spiritual growth in the Christian life. Jesus modeled them through his entire earthly ministry, and Christians should follow suit. This won’t be easy because practicing these disciplines forces you to swim against the current of culture but doing so will transform your spiritual life and help you to grow in ways you’ve never imagined.